If you are a sexually active woman, you have probably resorted to faking an orgasm every once in a while.
Perhaps it was to make your partner feel a bit better or maybe you were just tired and ready to bring the sexual encounter to an end.
This is pretty common, among younger and older sexually active women alike.
But why do women fake orgasms?
Understanding why women fake orgasms require a deep dive into the reasons why women feel the need to pretend that a sexual encounter is more pleasurable than it is.
And the answer to this question is even more complex than you think.
In this article, we will discuss the most obvious reasons for faking an orgasm as well as some of the lesser-known motivations.
We will also look at how common it is and how often it happens.
What this article covers:
Do Women Fake Orgasms?
Yes. If you thought you were only the female out there who felt the need to pretend in bed, think again.
The truth is that a massive part of the female population resort to faking orgasms, even if it is only once in a while.
And the worst part of it is that they get away with it, especially because it is not that easy to know how to tell if a woman is faking an orgasm.
For men, ejaculation is a dead giveaway that they had an orgasm but most females can easily enact the sounds and sensations associated with female orgasms, making it seem that they reached climax.
The truth is, any woman can squirt during orgasm with the right technique and a bit of practice but many choose not to, which means it is hard to tell whether a woman actually orgasmed, or if she is just faking it.
It is also true that women fake orgasms far more often than men do, mostly because it is so much harder for women to achieve orgasms during sex.
This is supported by many studies that discuss the low percentage of women who orgasm with penetration alone.
You may have also heard male partners complaining that they can’t make their girlfriend orgasm.
And can we blame them? It is tricky to bring a woman to the point of orgasm and it depends on a variety of sexual, environmental, and emotional factors.
It is no wonder that most females can’t orgasm every single time they have a sexual encounter.
But why do we feel the need to pretend? Why not just admit you didn’t have an orgasm and move on?
Well, it turns out this has a lot to do with the history of female sexual health and women’s overall dispositions to sex and their sexual experiences.
Why Is It That Women Fake Orgasms?
Let’s face it, after a long day at work, sex can be an arduous task. Especially if you are not in the mood and you are doing it on your partner’s behalf.
The fact is some girls can’t cum when they are tired.
When you are tired, you don’t experience arousal in the same way and often no amount of stimulation is going to lead you to an orgasm.
Sometimes, faking an orgasm seems like the only way out so that you can get it over with and get some shut-eye.
Some women also fake orgasms because they feel bad for their partners. Especially when they are trying hard and doing, or attempting to do, all the right things.
Instead of politely correcting them and being honest, many women pretend to enjoy their partner’s attempts at pleasuring them.
When looking at how many women orgasm during sex, it is safe to say a significant portion is only faking it to appease their partner and make them feel better about themselves.
You can’t look at why women fake orgasms without considering the history of female sexual health and the stigma surrounding it.
Historically, sexual pleasure has been dominated by cisgender males’ experiences of sex and the pleasure they derive from it.
Women’s pleasure has often taken a backseat and was not regarded as crucial for the sexual encounter to be regarded as successful.
After all, from an evolutionary point of view, the female orgasm has little to do with procreation whereas the male orgasm is imperative for reproducing because of the semen that is produced.
Even though there is a significant percentage of women who can squirt, the ejaculatory fluid produced by women has no reproductive value and, therefore, female orgasms have not been regarded with the same importance as male orgasms. Even if they involve ejaculation.
Unfortunately, all these beliefs still affect women today.
For example, one study found that women are perceived as being overly sensitive and defensive, which means they are less inclined to report a lack of orgasm during sex.
In this regard, women just find it easier to pretend out of fear of being perceived as a “typical woman”,
Conditioning plays a big role in women’s reasoning for faking orgasms and the reason for this is twofold.
On the one hand, women fake an orgasm as a means to reward good or correct sexual behavior in men.
For example, if a man has been spending more time on foreplay and went down on you, you may feel inclined to give them a pat on the back by leading them to believe you had an orgasm.
After all, this means they will repeat this behavior in the future.
On the other hand, women are also conditioned to believe that sex will or should end in an orgasm.
If you look at what happens when women cum on television or other popular media, it may seem that all women should achieve orgasm at the end of a sexual encounter.
And that this should come relatively easy to them.
For this reason, some women end up faking it because they think there is something wrong with them if they don’t achieve an orgasm of some sort.
Difficulty to Have Orgasm
If you find it difficult to have an orgasm, you are not alone. The truth is that it is harder for us girls to reach climax during intercourse than for men.
Foreplay plays a crucial part in this and so do other emotional and situational factors.
The importance of these factors is often downplayed in discussions on sexual health, leading many women to unsatisfying sex lives which rarely provide them with orgasms.
But women still want to keep up appearances and often fake orgasms as a means to bring the sexual encounter to an end.
Especially if they know that there is no hope of having an orgasm during sex.
After all, your partner may continue to try and provide you with what you need but sometimes it just won’t happen and the only way out is to fake it and pretend that you achieved a climax.
How Many Women Fake Orgasms?
Statistics show that 80% of women fake orgasms. This may seem like a lot, but given the variety of reasons that women present for faking it, it seems about accurate.
Other research has shown that 68% of women reported that they enjoyed sex at the moment when they faked their orgasm. In contrast, the remainder of the women explained that faking it was not a pleasurable experience.
This is proof that faking orgasms does not mean that you hated the sex overall.
In addition, it was found that 73% of the women who faked orgasms reported faking it with their husbands whereas a smaller percentage of 16% faked orgasms with lovers.
This suggests that faking orgasms is more common amongst married couples, which is in line with the dominant belief that people’s sexual activity and sexual satisfaction decline after marriage.
But this doesn’t have to be the case. Remember, faking an orgasm gives your partner the message that you are fully satisfied when in reality, this is not the case.
This is why many sexual therapists encourage open and honest communication among partners.
With communication, you can maximize your chances of achieving a real orgasm because you can communicate with your partner what you like and what you need to achieve an orgasm.
Just because sex can still be pleasurable without orgasms, doesn’t mean you don’t deserve to climax during intercourse.
How Often Do Women Fake Orgasms?
Research suggests that women fake orgasms at least half of the time.
One survey found that women fake it about four times a month (once a week). Other research has suggested that women fake it about 39 times a year. That is a lot of acting.
The reason for this is that women who have faked it once, find it easier to fake it again and are less inclined to approach their partners and ask for what they want. Especially after years of marriage.
Also, about half of men reported that they don’t think their partners ever fake it, which given the statistics of women who fake it, proves that men are mostly unaware that their partners are faking it.
Yes, it is true that most women fake orgasms.
But most women’s intentions behind this are pure and center around making their partner feel better or simply wanting the sexual encounter to come to an end.
Some women just find it so difficult to achieve an orgasm that they give up trying to achieve it during intercourse.
The important thing about faking it is to realize what message you are sending to your partner.
If you want your sex life to improve, you probably need to have a conversation instead of pretending that you are sexually satisfied, when you aren’t.
But if you are overworked and tired and just want a get-out-of-jail-free card for one night there is probably no harm in faking it so that you can get some well-deserved sleep without disappointing your partner.
Have you enjoyed this piece? Then consider checking other guides:
- How to Make a Woman Orgasm
- Best Sex Positions for Female Orgasms
- How to Make a Girl Have Multiple Orgasms
- How to Have a Better Orgasm for Women
- Is Squirting an Orgasm
- What Does a Female Orgasm Feel Like
- Why Can Women Have Multiple Orgasms
- Refractory Period Between Women Orgasms
- Woman Climax Signs
- How Many Times Can a Woman Climax
- What Makes a Woman Climax Every Time
- How Do Girls Know When They Cum
- Can a Man Feel a Woman Climax
- How to Fake Squirting
- How to Squirt with a Vibrator